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Do you have any ideas on how to improve the content on

John Henshell editing and consulting sample


Writing quality is uneven. I would fix that. Many reviews are wordy. Some directly address the reader and others do not. I would fix that, and have all reviews directly address the reader. I would greatly reduce the use of passive voice, which some of your writers use excessively. Writers need to sound more authoritative.


Most of the reviews sound like the reviewer has no personal experience with the reviewed product or service. As you are presenting your reviewers as experts, they need to write in a first-person voice. Your reviews are currently indistinguishable in style from most of those on As this competitor is very established and ranks high in Google search results, you need significant changes in format and content to create a distinction and establish a unique value.


Reviews need specific dates. As you are reviewing business and finance services, the writing needs to be more formal and efficient. For example, “pricey” is an unacceptably informal euphemism for expensive. A sentence such as, “No matter what your preferred channel is for contacting customer support, HostGator makes it easy to get an answer to your question as soon as possible,” wastes the reader’s time and sounds like marketing hype. It should read, “HostGator’s support representatives quickly respond to questions submitted online, via e-mail, or by phone.” A sentence or clause should not start with a negative.


If you want credibility, you need to add documentation. In the above example, add, “I tested each method, and the average wait was 1:47,” to prove the claim. Review readers want comparisons. What distinguishes 5-star services from each other? Adding a sentence such as, “My average wait with competitors was 4:29,” would establish your writers as competent reviewers and industry experts.


You need consistency as well as accuracy. “Ed Carlson has more than 20 years of experience,” but “Cliff Brody has over 30 years of experience.” The phrase “more than” is grammatically correct and more powerful. Both descriptions should match.


I have several unique ideas for review content that I look forward to sharing with you.


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